


You're a Midsummer Mountain in Bloom

by bertie456 (bertee)



Series: Bones: You're Lovely to Me [7]
Category: Bones (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-09-01
Updated: 2008-09-01
Packaged: 2017-10-27 20:14:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/299620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bertee/pseuds/bertie456





	You're a Midsummer Mountain in Bloom

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me."

Lifting her kit out of the trunk of Booth's SUV, Brennan frowned in confusion at his incredulous expression. "What's the matter?"

Booth just stared at her in disbelief. She stared back, not comprehending, and he gestured behind her with a sigh. "That, Bones. That is the matter."

Glancing over her shoulder, everything became clear, and she turned back to face him with an innocent smile. "I told you we'd have to walk up to the scene today."

"Yeah, which is why I wore boots," Booth replied, tapping his feet irritably on the stony ground in demonstration. "You somehow failed to mention that I'd need a sherpa and a pack-horse."

Her smirk was getting harder to hide, but she persevered nonetheless. "It's just a hill, Booth."

This declaration was met with a derisive snort as he corrected, "No, Bones, a hill is a what Jack and Jill strolled up to get to a well. This is not a hill. Jack and Jill would pass out through lack of oxygen before they reached the top."

Securing her portable kit on her back, Brennan stated firmly, "I'm sure Jack and Jill would manage just fine, although head injuries at altitude are never good. Besides, we don't need to walk the whole way up, just to the body."

"And how far up the hill is the body?" he asked, hoping the answer would involve a very small fraction.

"About three-quarters," she replied cheerfully, handing another backpack to Booth to carry. "It shouldn't take more than three hours to get there."

"Three hours?" She continued to inspect the map closely, and he repeated, more loudly this time, "Three hours?"

Looking up, she said in a mocking tone, "Yes, three. It's the number before four and after two."

Not waiting for his response, she walked briskly over to the trail head and started the ascent up the hill. Still reeling from the early information about the duration of the climb, Booth quickly slammed the trunk shut and jogged after her, locking the SUV as he went and trying to quell the nausea in his stomach.

"You know, you could've told me this last night," he complained when he'd caught up to her. "A little warning would've been nice."

Temperance felt the smirk tug at her lips again, but kept a straight face as she answered sincerely, "I told you the body was up on the hill and that we'd have to walk. What more did you want me to say?"

Striding alongside her, Booth said with a groan, "How about "it's a three hour hike up a mountain tomorrow, maybe you shouldn't drink so much"?"

"I _did_ tell you not to drink so much," she countered pointedly.

Booth sighed in annoyance. "I know you told me, Bones, it's just..." Searching for a suitable analogy, he explained, "You know how you don't like people giving you a conclusion without evidence? Well, you can't just tell me to stop drinking without giving me a good reason for it."

"I'm your partner; you should be able to trust me when I ask you to do something," she said, mildly insulted that he was blaming her for his hangover.

He looked at her with raised eyebrows, saying sarcastically, "Yeah, because you _always_ trust me when I give you case advice without evidence."

Point taken, Brennan swiftly switched tactics. "You shouldn't have been drinking so much anyway. You knew we were on a case and that we had a body to look at this morning."

Not enjoying the lecture, Booth said grumpily, "I know that, _mom_. But I hadn't seen Jimmy for years, and it would've been rude not to go for a drink with him."

" _A_ drink?" she asked, teasingly and her partner grimaced at the memory of the amount of alcohol he'd consumed the night before.

"Is it my fault Jimmy likes to drink?" he questioned rhetorically, before adding under his breath, "Should've known he'd end up running a bar."

Maintaining her scolding tone, Temperance said, "You shouldn't even have gone to the bar at all. I told you to get some sleep for today."

"What else was I supposed to do?" he asked, sulking slightly at her rebuke. "We couldn't get up to the body till morning, and it was either sitting in my hotel room, which is tiny by the way, or going out for a drink. It's not like I meant to run into Jimmy... Anyway," he added, with a smug smile, "I seem to remember you being there too."

"I was there to try to get you to go to bed," she stated matter-of-factly.

"Oh yeah?" Booth challenged, confidently. "And how did you even know I was there?"

"My hotel was next door," she said simply, a smile playing on her lips. "And apparently your voice travels when you sing." He looked down in embarrassment, clearly having forgotten about that part of the evening, and she smiled as she remarked, "You and Jimmy did a very interesting rendition of "I Will Survive"."

He shot her a glare. "You know, one day, you will get drunk and I will be there in the morning to make fun of you."

"I don't drink to excess," she said firmly. "Especially not when I'm supposed to be working."

She moved ahead of him on the trail and Booth sighed in frustration as he quickened his pace, his already aching head protesting at the effort. Catching up to her, he defended himself, "I'm perfectly capable of doing my job. I just wasn't expecting my job to involve mountain-climbing, that's all."

Enjoying his self-inflicted discomfort, Brennan picked up the pace again, smirking as he tried to keep up with her. "You were a Ranger, Booth. Didn't they walk faster than this?"

Gritting his teeth, he muttered, "Yeah, but I was prepared for those walks." Looking up at her retreating back, he complained again, "You know, you could've at least told me what was happening today. I'm fairly sure the words "three hour uphill hike" could've persuaded me to go to bed."

Temperance shrugged, knowing he was probably right but deciding against admitting it, instead saying sweetly, "I was trying to tell you, but it was kind of hard to talk to you last night." She glanced back at him as she explained, "You're very... tactile when you've been drinking."

This description was illustrated by her miming a groping motion with her hand and Booth's eyes widened in horror, wondering which part of his partner he'd squeezed in such a ungentlemanly fashion. Feeling awkward and embarrassed, he stammered, "Look, Bones, I'm sorry if I was inappropriate with you last night. I didn't mean-"

He was cut off by her laughter. "Booth, you weren't inappropriate with _me_." Pre-empting his question, she said, innocently, "But you'd have to ask Jimmy whether you slapping his ass was inappropriate in the context of your normal relationship."

Cheeks flushed in humiliation, he said dejectedly, "Please tell me you're making this up."

She shook her head with a grin. "And that's just what I saw when I was there. I don't know what happened after I left you two alone together..."

His eyes snapped back up to hers. "Whoa! No, okay? There was no togetherness of any kind. Me and Jimmy, we're buddies from way back. We served together, and I hadn't seen him for years, so we were just catching up and having a drink like old times, and there's nothing wrong with that."

Temperance's smile widened at his hurried and defensive explanation, and she gave him a patronising nod. "Of course."

Catching the hint of sarcasm in her words, Booth opened his mouth, ready to argue, but somehow couldn't find the words needed, instead responding with a frustrated growl and a clenching of fists in annoyance. This only caused her to smile more and he pointed his finger at her accusingly, "You are a sadistic woman, Bones. Not only are you dragging me up a mountain at 8.30am and enjoying the fact that I'm exhausted and hungover, but you also seem to be getting a kick out of mocking me."

Brennan said nothing in reply, merely quickening the pace again and smiling as Booth struggled to keep up. She looked back at him, saying sincerely but with a knowing smile, "Glad to hear you had a good time last night."

Booth glowered at her, his head pounding as his feet thumped hard against the rocks, and muttered bitterly, "Sadistic."

Silence descended over the walking partners for a while as they made their way carefully over a large cluster of rocks, trying to find convenient footholds. They were both relieved, Booth admittedly more so than Brennan, when they reached a more grassy slope between the trees which towered up either side of them. Pausing for breath, they drank gratefully from bottles of water before continuing on their way, noting that the mountain looked no less high when one was actually climbing it than it did from the ground.

After another ten minutes of silent, concentrated climbing, Booth's contented groan filled the air. Turning round in bemusement, Brennan saw her partner walking backwards up the hill, smiling at the chance to rest some of his tired muscles. She paused to watch him, hands on her hips as she warned, "That won't do you any good. The human body was designed to walk forward, not backward."

Petulantly ignoring her, Booth continued to walk backwards, enjoying the lack of pain in his legs. As he picked up speed, he passed her, saying cockily, "Give it a try, Bones. Maybe the human body could do with some changes."

Temperance shook her head, facing him as she followed. "The body developed this way for a reason. Evolution taught us that we're supposed to walk forward."

"Well, at the moment, I'm thinking evolution got it wrong," he pondered with a satisfied grin. "I mean, why would I need to walk forward all the time?"

The large rock behind him answered for her.

Before Brennan could shout a warning, Booth's calf hit the rock, wedging his heel in the grass as he fell over backwards in surprise. He landed hard on his hip bone with a groan of pain as his other foot slid in the dewy grass, causing him to tilt as he fell. Temperance smiled as he sat upright with a dazed expression, but approached to help him back to his feet.

"That would be why you can't walk backward," she said with a know-it-all tone. "Your eyes are in the front of your head."

Rolling his eyes, Booth pulled himself back to his feet but winced loudly when he felt a sharp pain run through his leg. His partner's eyes widened in concern and she moved closer, giving him a cursory glance over. "What hurts?"

Looking down at his leg, he groaned in annoyance. "Oh, man! These were my favorite pair of jeans."

Ignoring his complaints, she moved round to his right leg, and saw the mid-thigh rip in the denim, now stained dark with blood. Biting her lip in sympathy, she caught sight of a jagged rock on the ground where he'd fallen, the tip of which was also colored crimson from where it had punctured Booth's leg.

Rolling up her sleeves, she crouched by his side to get a better look at his injury and was surprised when he quickly moved away, straightening his jacket, "I'm fine, Bones."

"You're bleeding," she helpfully pointed out. "The fabric's only going to irritate it if we don't put a dressing on it."

"We? I can dress myself, you know."

"I'm sure you can," she said as she pulled the small first aid kit out of her backpack. "But while I'm down here..."

Booth swallowed hard, not wishing to give any indication of what his mind leapt to at her words. Wanting to appear composed, he shuffled back over to where she knelt, reluctantly agreeing, "Okay, just stick a bandaid on it and let's get moving."

She looked up at him in expectation. "I'm going to need you to pull your jeans down so I can get a better look at the wound."

"What?" he asked, suddenly panicked. "Bones, I am not taking my pants off in the middle of a National Park."

"I'm not asking you to take them off. Just pull them down so I can see what I'm working with here."

Sighing and silently begging her not to say anything else that could send his already innuendo-laden mind into overdrive, Booth quickly unfastened his belt and button, before unzipping his jeans and letting them fall to his knees. Brennan leaned in close with a low whistle, "It's bigger than it looked."

His throat suddenly became very dry as a completely different scenario for that remark filled his mind. Feeling deeply uncomfortable at her proximity, he said impatiently, "Could you just get on with it please?"

Nodding, she pulled out an antiseptic wipe and carefully dabbed it around his cut. Booth winced at the stinging sensation and jerked away, but she gripped his lower thigh firmly, "Stop moving or I'm not going to be able to do this properly."

Casting his eyes heavenward, he stood still as she continued to clean the wound, trying to ignore the sensations her hand was creating in certain parts of his anatomy. She pressed a gauze pad to his leg and pulled out a bandage before instructing him, "Spread your legs."

Booth froze at her command, deciding that in his alternate sequence of events she would not be the one giving that order. Wishing he'd worn larger boxers than his tight black pair, he edged his legs apart, hoping that would be the only movement from the lower half of his body.

It wasn't, as she spoke again, "Move them further apart. I need to be able to reach round."

Complying, he tried desperately to think of something deeply unarousing to distract himself from what she was doing between his thighs. He'd gone through baseball, hockey, and football before she'd even got the bandage around his leg once, and so then focused all his attention on thoughts of naked old ladies to try and counteract the effects of her smooth knuckles brushing against the inside of his leg. Unsure what to do with his hands, he held them behind his back as though on parade, his nails digging into the flesh of his palms as he tried in vain not to think of his partner kneeling at his crotch in any other circumstances.

"How does that feel?" she asked with interest.

Booth could only nod in reply, unsure if he could form recognisable words with her hands on him like that. Not looking at her, he made a brief attempt at speaking, choking out, "That's great, Bones."

Her satisfied noise was not the most helpful of replies and he felt another twinge in his groin but kept his eyes forward, not wanting to know the full extent of the effect she was having on him.

However, his heart leapt when she said happily, "Alright, all done." Breathing a sigh of relief, he moved quickly away from her, reaching down to pull his jeans up while she packed her first aid kit back into her bag. Breathing heavily, Booth fumbled with the zipper as he said, stumbling over his words, "Uh, thanks for helping out, Bones."

She looked up at him with an open smile. "Anytime."

Taking another deep breath, Booth pulled the zip up on his jeans as Brennan stood, hoisting her pack onto her back again. Preparing to move off, they were both taken by surprise when they heard a loud voice calling from down the hill, "Agent Booth! Dr Brennan!"

Turning to see the source, they saw the local sheriff walking quickly up towards them, waving a small black case as he said jovially, "Found your camera by your truck. Can't go taking pictures of body parts without this."

Brennan nodded gratefully, smiling at the middle-aged man. "Thank you, Sheriff Ricks."

"No problem, ma'am," he said cheerfully. "I was coming up to the scene anyways." Leaning in towards them, he said with a broad smile, "Do you mind if I give you one piece of advice though?"

Booth frowned but his partner just looked at the sheriff expectantly. "By all means."

Clearing his throat, he said, "Look, I know what it's like being a young couple in love, but public indecency is still an offence, including in a National Park." He nodded towards the trees to their right. "Next time, at least take it into the woods, alright? Trust me, it's much more private in there." Giving them a friendly wink, he headed off up the slope, leaving the stunned couple behind him.

Brennan turned to Booth, confused. "What was he talking about?"

He shook his head, with a nervous smile as he lied, "No idea, Bones." Before she could analyse further, he prompted, "Let's go find that body."

Shrugging, she set off after the sheriff, leaving Booth following behind as he mentally added the sheriff's suggestion to his already long list of Temperance-Brennan-related fantasies.


End file.
